Wayfinding in the dark
Winter Solstice with children
I call it The Holidays when I’m being sweeping, or switch from Christmas to Navidad to Diwali or Channukah depending on who I’m speaking to, but when I really sit with it, it’s Winter Solstice that has my heart. This isn’t because I’m uncommonly attuned to the natural world (though I am always striving to be more so) or because solstice has a particularly important spot in my personal history. The presence of light within the darkness is a theme in most celebrations this time of year, and I love that this most elemental of natural phenomena can nurture and connect us across cultures and belief systems. Still, there’s something particular about solstice that I have embraced especially since becoming a parent.
During winter in the northern hemisphere, the upper half of the earth is at its furthest lean away from the sun — leading to the shortest day and longest night of the year. (Summer solstice is when sun is high and direct in the sky, and spring and autumn equinox are when day and night are nearly equal.) The word “solstice” comes from the Latin sol stetit meaning sun stood still. On the twenty-first day in the northern hemisphere’s December, the sun is at its lowest arc on our horizon. Yet as we move through the shortest day and longest night of the year, we also start moving toward the rising of the light. For several millennia, the metaphor of turning toward the light has been irresistible to our species!
Yet while we humans direct ourselves squarely toward the sun, winter solstice invites us to consider both the light and the dark. This duality is one we can find mirrored everywhere. I see this duality in myself and in each of my children. And I see it everywhere in today’s world. What a life, what an incredible time to be alive, but also what great sorrows.
Like many first-time parents, when my first was born I felt a drive to rethink what I had always done and make my way towards a sense of intentionality around this time of year. What do we—as a family, as a community and as interconnected individuals—want to feel, observe and co-create anyway? What shall we carry forward, and what shall we leave behind? How can we use our attention to honor what’s important to us, and how do we ritualize it?
I’ve been feeling so much momentum around defining and naming what it is I do this time of year, and I wanted to share — for anyone interested in observing or celebrating Winter Solstice as a family, or quite literally, any other holiday or tradition— as I believe this recipe applies across the board. If you’re looking to find purpose and meaning this time of year, whether that’s through the holidays or elsewhere, this might help you map and define what’s important for you. I’m experimenting by putting this one behind a paywall because I share a few tangible tips, titles and resources, and to maintain my family’s privacy online. If you’re already a subscriber or considering becoming one, thank you. Subscriptions allow me to focus more on writing here, something I truly love. If now is not the right time for you to purchase a subscription but you know your family would benefit from this, please reach out and I’ll send you my guide, no questions asked.
